![]() ![]() Yet, my Father’s word says, “Never take revenge, my friends, but instead let God’s anger do it. I am again made aware of what really lies within my heart…sin! ![]() In extreme circumstances like the murder of my cousin and the maltreatment of my children, my husband, and myself by a loved one, my mouth speaks wickedness. Lastly, I search for patience and kindness when dealing with those who have harmed me and/or my family. “This is true, because I have not spoken on my own authority, but the Father who sent me has commanded me what I must say and speak.” (John 12:49.) Our Father presides over us all. When I give in to my husband I stop struggling against my Father and put complete confidence in Him as it is Him who governs my husband. “It is better to trust in the Lord than to depend on man.” (Psalms 118:8.) For when I surrender to my husband my reliance does not lie in man but rather in my Father. But now peacefulness washes over me as I stop fighting and work to stay faithful in submitting. Two years ago I never would have said such a thing as I was too busy fighting him on every decision that escaped his lips. How wonderful it is to submit to my husband. You are now her daughters if you do good and are not afraid of anything.” (1 Peter 3: 5-6.) Sarah was like that she obeyed Abraham and called him her master. “For the devout women of the past who placed their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful by submitting themselves to their husbands. It also holds me accountable for being in my Father’s word everyday! Not to mention submissive. It just means I fall short when it comes to self control and remembering that my actions speak louder than words. But why does repulsiveness and sin come so easily? Does it mean I am a bad person? Then, humbly, I am held responsible of acknowledging my huge screw up and asking for forgiveness. I am no longer a model Christian but rather a prime example of how not to behave. When stressed or confronted by negativity (whether it be a person or situation) am I quick to anger or swift to remember that love is patient, love is kind? As embarrassing as it is to say, I feel the ugliness spew from within and contaminate everything for which I have worked so hard. When the pressure is on, do I behave as Christ would or do I embarrass myself in the shadow of the cross? I believe in a lot of cases the latter is more fitting. Why do I react to things the way that I do? This little piece of scripture has been convicting for my lately as I have been looking into my heart for answers. ".out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks." (Luke 6:45 NIV)
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